This is pretty cool: Dummies Book Cover Generator (via eMusings). Now you can generate a fake “For Dummies” book for any occasion (which would have been handy when I originally created this and this). Imagine the mayhem…
At the very least, I can now mockup my For Tards ideas:
If you enjoyed the Chuck Norris Facts site, and like the TV show 24, well then, this is the perfect mashup for you: Random Jack Bauer Facts. Same exact premise (some are even lifted from the Chuck Norris Facts!), and some are really funny:
The city of Los Angeles once named a street after Jack Bauer in gratitude for his saving the city several times. They had to rename it after people kept dying when they tried to cross the street. No one crosses Jack Bauer and lives.
If Jack Bauer was in a room with Hitler, Stalin, and Nina Meyers, and he had a gun with 2 bullets, he’d shoot Nina twice.
Jack Bauer’s calender goes from March 31st to April 2nd, no one fools Jack Bauer.
Jack Bauer once forgot where he put his keys. He then spent the next half-hour torturing himself until he gave up the location of the keys.
Funny mashup goodness! Now, I need to set about creating a similar ripoff mashup site with some other larger-than-life character…
There’s a whole bunch of stuff I’ll bet you never knew about Chuck Norris.
Guns don’t kill people. Chuck Norris kills people.
There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live.
Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
Chuck Norris doesn’t read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
Chuck Norris can lead a horse to water AND make it drink.
If you ask Chuck Norris what time it is, he always says, “Two seconds ’til.” After you ask, “Two seconds ’til what?” he roundhouse kicks you in the face.
Chuck Norris can win a game of Connect Four in only three moves.
Chuck Norris originally appeared in the “Street Fighter II” video game, but was removed by Beta Testers because every button caused him to do a roundhouse kick. When asked bout this “glitch,” Norris replied, “That’s no glitch.”
Chuck Norris CAN believe it’s not butter.
Some people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas.
Chuck Norris is currently suing MySpace for taking the name of what he calls everything around you.
If at first you don’t succeed, you’re not Chuck Norris.
Google won’t search for Chuck Norris because it knows you don’t find Chuck Norris, he finds you.
When Chuck Norris does division, there are no remainders.
Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse-kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn’t stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.
Okay, in light of all the Dick Cheney hijinks, I saw this on Boing Boing the other day and I finally succumbed. What can I say? This makes me want to laugh out loud every time I see it:
For the record, my favorites are “Telekinesis,” “Raining blows down upon you,” and “With his bare hands.”
It’s amazing what they’re publishing in For Dummies books these days… I almost wish I had made this up:
This just makes me laugh. The fact that it’s for real just makes this that much more irrationally funny to me…
So first a mouse set a man’s house on fire, now a puppy has done the same thing here in Bend:
A frisky puppy left in a laundry room apparently sparked a northeast Bend house fire that almost claimed his life. Investigators said Friday the dog caused an aerosol can to discharge vapors that a water heater pilot light ignited, setting the room ablaze.
It’s like When Animals Attack, but weirder. Awesome.
As an aside, I really like the new NewsChannel 21 site. Barney done good!
Okay, this is kind of an awful story…
No, scratch that. It’s a story that seems like it should be awful, but I just can’t take it seriously. It just makes me laugh. I can’t help it: Mouse takes down house.
On Saturday, a Fort Sumner man’s home fell victim to a mouse fire.
Homeowner Luciano Mares said he caught a mouse inside his residence and discarded the creature in a pile of garden refuse he was burning on his property near the home.
“I had some leaves burning outside, so I threw it in the fire, and the mouse was on fire and ran back at the house,” he said.
The. Mouse. Was. On. Fire.
Update: Snopes debunks it. It almost happened, but the mouse was already dead.
Update #2: According to CNN, the story may be true after all:
Is that plausible? Fort Sumner Fire Chief Juan Chavez said Tuesday he thinks so.
“There’s no reason for him to lie about what he told us,” Chavez said. “I don’t doubt it at all.”
There’s hope!
Okay, not so much really since it’s only the beginning of January, but go watch this. It’s surprisingly hilarious.
