Category: Humor

  • It’s been awhile for Scooby…

    I figured it’s been just long enough for everyone to forget…

    Scooby's at the front door! ticket

  • The name game

    While I can’t say as I’ve found much use out of MySpace, my sister-in-law did post an amusing bulletin that I had to steal. I’m sure we’ve all seen variations on the name game… here’s a collection of rules for generating ten of them (along with my results).

    Your Spy Name: Middle name and current street name
    Travis Desert (only part of my street name, so it wouldn’t sound so goofy)

    Your Movie Star Name: Grandfather/grandmother on your mom’s side, your favorite candy
    Guy Snickers

    Your Rap Name: First initial of first name, first two or three letters of your last name
    J-Ab (Jab?)

    Your Gamer Tag: A favorite color, a favorite animal
    Purple Chicken

    Your Soap Opera Name: Middle name, city where you were born
    Travis St. Helens

    Your Star Wars Name: First 3 letters of your last name, last 3 letters of mother’s maiden name, first 3 letters of your pet’s name
    Abeittbob (or Abe Itt Bob as they tend to do names in Star Wars)

    Your Jedi Name: Middle name spelled backwards, your mom’s maiden name spelled backwards
    Sivart Rolyat (I made up the maiden name… no way I’m posting that online for real)

    Your Porn Star Name: First pet’s name, the street you grew up on
    Curly Deer

    Your Superhero Name: “The”, your favorite color, the automobile your dad drives
    The Purple Chevy

    Your Action Hero Name: First Name Of The Main Character In The Last Film You Watched, last Food You Just Ate
    Popeye Radish

    So, what are your names?

  • People over 30 should be dead

    I’d seen this before, floating around the net, and should’ve linked to it then; but now is as good a time as any: People over 30 should be dead.

    As children, we would ride in cars with no seat belts or air bags.

    Riding in the back of a pickup truck on a warm day was always a special treat.

    We drank water from the garden hose and not from a bottle. Horrors!

    We ate cupcakes, bread and butter, and drank soda pop with sugar in it, but we were never overweight because we were always outside playing. We shared one soft drink with four friends, from one bottle, and no one actually died from this.

    You have to go read it all. Love it! :)

  • 10 Commandments… remixed

    I’ve been liking the remixed movie trailers I’ve been seeing lately, but this one made me laugh tonight: 10 Things I Hate About Commandments. Someone’s remixed the Charlton Heston movie as a teen comedy… I especially like the surprise addition to the cast at the end. :)

    Via Boing Boing.

  • You know what the Easter Bunny is doing the other 364 days of the year?

    The Easter Bunny hates youOh, this is such a twisted, twisted thing to laugh at, and yet I couldn’t stop laughing: The Easter Bunny Hates You (video).

    I wouldn’t let the kids watch this one, lest they be scarred for life…

    Thanks, Shannon!

  • For Dummies book cover generator

    This is pretty cool: Dummies Book Cover Generator (via eMusings). Now you can generate a fake “For Dummies” book for any occasion (which would have been handy when I originally created this and this). Imagine the mayhem…

    At the very least, I can now mockup my For Tards ideas:

    Book For Tards

  • Jack Bauer Facts

    If you enjoyed the Chuck Norris Facts site, and like the TV show 24, well then, this is the perfect mashup for you: Random Jack Bauer Facts. Same exact premise (some are even lifted from the Chuck Norris Facts!), and some are really funny:

    The city of Los Angeles once named a street after Jack Bauer in gratitude for his saving the city several times. They had to rename it after people kept dying when they tried to cross the street. No one crosses Jack Bauer and lives.

    If Jack Bauer was in a room with Hitler, Stalin, and Nina Meyers, and he had a gun with 2 bullets, he’d shoot Nina twice.

    Jack Bauer’s calender goes from March 31st to April 2nd, no one fools Jack Bauer.

    Jack Bauer once forgot where he put his keys. He then spent the next half-hour torturing himself until he gave up the location of the keys.

    Funny mashup goodness! Now, I need to set about creating a similar ripoff mashup site with some other larger-than-life character…

  • Chuck Norris facts

    There’s a whole bunch of stuff I’ll bet you never knew about Chuck Norris.

    Guns don’t kill people. Chuck Norris kills people.

    There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live.

    Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.

    Chuck Norris doesn’t read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.

    Chuck Norris can lead a horse to water AND make it drink.

    If you ask Chuck Norris what time it is, he always says, “Two seconds ’til.” After you ask, “Two seconds ’til what?” he roundhouse kicks you in the face.

    Chuck Norris can win a game of Connect Four in only three moves.

    Chuck Norris originally appeared in the “Street Fighter II” video game, but was removed by Beta Testers because every button caused him to do a roundhouse kick. When asked bout this “glitch,” Norris replied, “That’s no glitch.”

    Chuck Norris CAN believe it’s not butter.

    Some people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas.

    Chuck Norris is currently suing MySpace for taking the name of what he calls everything around you.

    If at first you don’t succeed, you’re not Chuck Norris.

    Google won’t search for Chuck Norris because it knows you don’t find Chuck Norris, he finds you.

    When Chuck Norris does division, there are no remainders.

    Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse-kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn’t stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.