Sunbeams illuminating a coastal forest in Port Orford, Oregon

Chuggnutt!

Category: Holidays

  • Auld lang syne

    I suppose the measure of how good a New Year’s party is would be the hangover you have the next day… if so, then the party we had last night was a pretty good one. It wasn’t wild or crazy or anything like that, we just had friends over (a bunch of them brought their kids), and it was just the accumulation over the course of the evening that did me in.

    That, and the two (two! ugh) shots of Jagermeister I drank. I was mostly fine until that.

    Anyway.

    I never did the obligatory post-Christmas post-birthday post, either. So I’m rolling it all into one.

    My birthday was very nice. We had lunch at the Bend Brewing Company where I drank their Hophead Imperial IPA and their seasonal Doppelbock. Both good. I love the fish and chips there. For dinner we had take-out Chinese and my mom and brother and his girlfriend joined us. Cake was a delicious dense dark chocolate cake.

    My gifts? The traditional photo Christmas ornament (the photo is of the kids), a beer rating guide book (the name escapes me at the moment and it’s not nearby), Barnes & Noble gift cards, money, a PS2 video game, a bottle of Jack Daniels with a measuring shot glass, and a neat shot glass and beer tasting glass from my brother in San Diego.

    Christmas Eve was dinner at our house with the family. Lasagna, this year. (We don’t really have a traditional Christmas Eve dinner, unlike, say, ham on Christmas day or turkey at Thanksgiving.) We set out the mountain of presents (90% for the kids) and the kids could hardly get to sleep.

    Christmas morning the kids were up at 6:30 and going through their stockings by flashlight. So I got up a little before 7, started coffee, checked out the stocking loot, and helped the kids sort out presents. You can imagine what followed.

    My gifts? Stephen King’s latest novel, Lisey’s Story, slippers, a bottle of beer, a book on the making of the Charlie Brown Christmas TV special, some crafty ornaments from the kids, more money, another PS2 game, a gift certificate to Pegasus Books here in town, and surprisingly, I even got the lightsaber I asked for! Totally didn’t see that one coming.

    Am I forgetting anything? …probably.

    Since then, I’ve spent some of my money and gift cards on a bunch of books, another PS2 game, some beer. And, I only worked two days in the past 11—five days off around Christmas, two at work, then four more for this last New Year weekend. Going back to work tomorrow? Uh, yeah, not really looking forward to it.

    …but at least I’m not still hungover!

  • Fantasy wish list

    I’m nerdy, no two ways about it: while thinking about the kind of things I would want for Christmas this year, I got to wondering about fictional gadgets and technology that I wouldn’t at all mind having. So, as a perfectly goofy/nerdy/idle/self-amusing blog post, I put together a wish list of sci-fi/fantasy gadgets I’d like to get for Christmas (or my birthday).

    (Incidentally, I do have an Amazon.com wish list here. It doesn’t necessarily match the list I made for my family this year, but I’m just sayin’.)

    Lightsaber

    Forget laser guns, a lightsaber is the perfect all-in-one weapon. The blade is indestructible, cuts through anything, deflects energy blasts, and acts as a flashlight. Plus, when you’re done slicing up Sith Lords, it has a ton of household uses.

    Tricorder

    The ultimate all-purpose scanning device and handheld computer. As the various Star Trek series show, there’s really nothing your tricorder can’t tell you—from general weather and environmental conditions to the movements and stats of hidden people to the spin orientation of quarks.

    Sonic Screwdriver

    Doctor Who’s miracle tool. There was almost nothing he couldn’t do with that thing… repairing any machine… unlocking any door… cooking meals… getting cash from ATMs…

    Time-traveling DeLorean… or TARDIS

    Gotta have a time machine.

    For vehicular transport, I can’t decide between these two. If I went with the DeLorean, I’d have to go with the fusion-powered flying version, but then I’d run into various hijinks related to the existence of magical automobiles in the wrong era. And, of course, the hassle of being able to get the car up to (arbitrarily) 88 miles per hour just to get anywhen. Plus, it doesn’t travel spatially—you travel to the same corresponding point in space in the different time period. Could be a problem if there’s a building there in the future or something.

    But, the thing looks cool.

    On the other hand, Doctor Who’s TARDIS travels both temporally and spatially, and is bigger on the inside than the outside. Drawbacks? Doesn’t seem like you actually have much control over where and when you travel. Plus, it always seems to look like a goofy blue police box. Or, at least the Doctor’s did. Perhaps I could get one of my own, an updated, working model.

    Babel fish

    Yeah, this isn’t a gadget per se, but man, being able to understand and communicate in any language without having to fiddle around with something as cumbersome as a Universal Translator…

    That’s all I can come up with right now. Though I’m sure somebody will point out that since I chose a Babel fish from The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, that I should choose, well, “The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy” as a must-have gadget. Nah. I figure I’ll just load Wikipedia onto my tricorder.

  • Hack Bend holiday shopping guide

    A little cross-pollination: over on Hack Bend I’m going to be posting a Holiday Shopping Guide, and I want to make it collaborative as well as listing my own opinions on where to shop for the holidays.

    So if you live in Central Oregon and have any recommendations or want a piece of the action, let me know, or comment on my Hack Bend post.

    Cheers!

  • These Santas are so wrong

    SouthFlorida.com is running a photo gallery of kids scared of Santa Claus, which is gut-busting funny. (Really! I laughed out loud at a lot of these.) But some of these Santas are so messed up that I had to re-run them here. (But go check out the rest.)

    Like this one…

    Bad Santa!
    Hard-drinkin’ Santa

    Or this one:

    Bad Santa!
    America’s Most Wanted Santa

    More…

    Bad Santa!

    Bad Santa!

    Bad Santa!
    Bank Robbery Gone Bad Santa

    And while those are fun, what the hell is with these fake Santas?

    Fake Santa!

    Fake Santa!
    Holy shit this freaks me out… it’s like Night of the Corn Santa or something

    And finally, I think we have what qualifies as Worst Santa Ever:

    Worst Santa Ever
    Via Boing Boing.

  • What’s shakin’?

    Yes, I’m aware I haven’t posted much here on chuggnutt.com lately. I’ve been focusing most of my writing energy on The Brew Site and Hack Bend recently, since I keep thinking of topical things for those blogs and I really don’t want to become a caricature of myself with “Lost” rants.

    Aside from that, here’s a loosely-presented list of things that have been happening:

    Thanksgiving was very nice, and low-key. We did the expected big dinner at my parents’ house, though we weren’t a big crowd. We made some excellent pumpkin pies with a gingerbread graham cracker crust. (Gingerbread graham crackers. Seriously. Rachael Ray is on the box.)

    I hung outdoor Christmas lights on the house the day after Thanksgiving. The cold air gave me a bit of a cold.

    The day after that consisted of generously picking up weary travelers Shannon and Brian from the Redmond Airport; Shannon confessed a creepy desire to pummel saguaro cacti. Whack job. :)

    The two recent books I’ve read/are reading are Stephen Baxter’s Manifold: Time and Manifold: Space. I think Time is the better written of the two, where he actually builds characterizations (mostly; he’s not as strong here as some writers) for his cast, whereas in Space they feel more like mouthpieces or conveniences. Maybe he just got lazy, since he’s sort of continuing the main character’s story, and didn’t feel necessary to rehash… or not. I don’t know. They’re full of interesting concepts, nonetheless.

    When I get a chance (which isn’t often), I’ve been thoroughly enjoying “Secret Weapons Over Normandy” for the PlayStation 2. That game completely rocks. I didn’t think I’d like it as much as I do; I think a big part of that is the relatively simple controls used.

    (Yes, that’s me: I need simple video game controls. I’m retro that way.)

    Anything else? Um… working. Nothing interesting to report there.

  • Happy Thanksgiving!

    I hope everyone’s Thanksgiving is a good one. We’re baking pumpkin pies today (made with a gingerbread graham cracker crust) and heading out to my folks’ house for dinner and family. Enjoy the long weekend!

  • Best. Party. EVAR!!!!!11!1

    C’mon, with a title like that, how could it not be?

    “It” being the Halloween party we went to last night. Costumes, booze, food, and friends. And a giant inflatable Scooby Doo. (Yes, it was this same Scooby.)  Although this year, perhaps the title of this post should be, “Oh my God, they killed Scooby! Those bastards!”

    Yes, that’s right: somebody killed Scooby Doo.

    See, when Scooby disappeared from the back deck (where he was leering in the window this year), the assumption was the thing had deflated. Somebody suggested that Scooby had, indeed, been killed, but I thought it was just the running gag. Until Scooby’s giant deflated plastic corpse was discovered lying in a pool of blood with a large knife in the neck.

    (I think this Family Guy clip applies here. I’ve been looking for an excuse to link to that.)

    I knew I had been beating that dead horse into the ground, but I had no idea it would incite a murderous crime of passion…

    That was a good party.

    Those bastards!

  • How I spent…

    Yeah, it’s one of those “How I spent” posts, inspired by Shannon’s this time. Only I’ll confine mine to my super-busy holiday weekend.

    Saturday, my wife and daughter went to Sisters with my mother for the rock and gem show. They do this every year, it’s tradition. While they were gone, my son and I returned a bunch of cans and bottles to Safeway, went to the library, and stopped by the homebrew shop so I could pick up ingredients for a batch of beer and a wine kit for my wife.

    A highlight of the homebrew shop: my soon-to-be-five-year-old son asking when we could leave because he didn’t like this store… I guess not enough toys? Too creepy for kids? I got a chuckle out of it.

    When the others got back, my daughter went home with my mother to have a sleepover, and the rest of us went back to town to check out the Saturday market, get some ice cream, and then head home again. For dinner it was Cibelli’s Pizza (had to go pick it up).

    Sunday it was off to Albertson’s to return some more bottles and cans, return some movies, and run to Bi-Mart. I transplanted a bunch of plants (one of my hop plants, several tomatoes, a couple of beans). In the afternoon we went out to my parents’ place for dinner and to pick up our daughter. It was a hot enough day that I took the kids over to Reynolds Pond and we played in the water a bit.

    I took Monday off from work, and it was a big homebrew day that I had planned with my friend Paul. After going out to breakfast at McKay Cottage, we spent a good part of the day brewing, and then the afternoon and evening turned into an impromptu barbecue and party with Paul and his wife, Shannon and Brian, and Simone and her husband. The day was punctuated with the power going out all over town (only about a half hour for us, though I heard other people were out for hours), lighting off fireworks that Simone’s husband had brought over, and a friendly poker game.

    That night at 12:30 AM, someone rang our doorbell. I, however, slept through it, and only woke when my wife, er, woke me. Muzzy-headed with alcohol and sleep, all I knew was that the dog was barking in the middle of the night so I yelled at him to stop, only to find out he was actually performing a service for once… hilarity ensues. I stumbled around in the dark for a while, only wanting to go back to bed, my wife called the police to notify them of the “ding dong ditch” (a name I’m quite sure I’d never heard before then), and left the closet light on all night. I didn’t get a very good night’s sleep.

    Tuesday the Fourth found us getting up and ready to go to the Pet Parade. After the Parade (we hung out there with Shannon and Brian), we wandered the park checking out the booths and food they have every year (festival-style), and then checked out the library’s book sale. (Scored a stack of books for only $4!) In the afternoon we were back out to my parents’ place for dinner and fireworks, and then when we got back home we did a few more fireworks when it got dark, and then watched the (in)famous Pilot Butte fireworks show. We have a pretty good view of that from our lawn.

    And that, in a not-so-small nutshell, was our holiday weekend. Sometime I’d just like to relax for a day or two, you know?

  • Offline for Memorial Day

    Just a quick note to let everyone know that I’ll be offline for the Memorial Day weekend—through Tuesday, actually. Hopefully everyone has a safe and fun holiday weekend!

  • April 1 (Fools, and not)

    So. April 1st. Any April Fool’s Day stories to pass on? I have one. My wife calls this morning as they’re supposed to be leaving San Diego, and says they’re not leaving because my daughter has a 103 degree fever. I freak out a little bit.

    April Fool’s!

    That’s all I got, actually. I forgot it was the first of April.

    In non-practical joke news, I helped Shannon and Brian move into their new apartment in downtown Bend. Well, I and five other people helped. Not a bad move at all, though; they already had everything packed up and ready to go, and they don’t own too many big pieces of furniture. And, really, they don’t own that much stuff—at least compared to the amount of crap I and my family have been hauling around for years now. So we were mostly done by one o’clock. And got pizza and beer out of the deal.

    Their new place is pretty sweet. Overlooking downtown, mere blocks away from, well, everything, with a view of Pilot Butte from the balcony—yeah, we’re gonna be hanging out there a lot this summer, I think. Several of us have already discussed getting our own keys and setting up a mini-fridge full of beer on the balcony. :).